Winning With People
It seems like the easiest thing yet humans have the hardest time being nice to other people; treating others as they would like to be treated.
While one could aim to dig deep to the root cause of this unpleasant behaviour that is so common, our societies all over the world are plagued by its fallouts whether it is tribalism, nepotism, racism, terrorism, crimes of all shades and forms, I choose rather to focus on how we can be better at treating other people right.
The easiest way to go about this is to figure out how you would like to be treated and to treat others the same way. The beautiful thing is that one good turn really does deserve another, and the good we do today we will reap tomorrow.
The question now is: what specific actions can we take to treat other people right? What actions can we encourage our children to take to treat others the way they themselves would like to be treated?
Giving is one of the greatest ways to treat others right because it speaks volumes about the value you place on the recipient of your giving. It says you value them and care what goes on in their lives. It shows that you are not a person who is tight-fisted and stingy and it shows that you are grateful for what you have enough o want to be a blessing to others.
- Show respect
Respect could come from having deep admiration for the abilities, qualities or achievements of others. Also, respect is having due regard for the feelings, wishes, or rights of others. When we respect others we understand that they have boundaries they would like us to keep and we honour that; we do not have an unrealistic expectation that they will always see things our way or agree to do whatever we want. Wisdom is knowing that others will have a different viewpoint on issues and leaving room to accommodate this difference in your interactions with them.
- Have high expectations of others
It is a proven fact that people often live up or down to our expectations of them so it is always best to expect good from others and to appreciate their efforts in the right direction. This has to balanced of course with not blindly trusting persons of questionable character.
- Be a person who adds value to others
To successfully do this, you must first be a valuable person yourself. Learn; love to learn; commit to lifelong learning and be happy to share your knowledge with others. Besides the value you will add to them, you will increase your own value as you gain deeper understanding of any subject matter you teach others.
As humans we have a lot to offer no matter our situation in life. A person who treats others right is a person who loves to share her time, talents. And resources with others.
Sharing brings joy to both the giver and the recipient and builds bonds of togetherness that cannot easily be broken.
We all make mistakes and we all would appreciate being forgiven quickly of our wrongs. One very interesting quote about forgiveness is that. “Forgiveness is like releasing a prisoner from his cell only to realise that the prisoner was you all along”.
When we hold a grudge against someone we put ourselves in a cell where we are not free to be our selves around the person; where we hurt badly when we remember the wrong that was done. But when we forgive we are free to always be our authentic selves and to heal from the hurt and pain of past occurrences.
- Genuinely care
In our world today, it is common to see people make a grand show of the acts of kindness that they do. While people do this for different reasons, it is important that we really, truly, genuinely care about people because if we fake that we care, sooner or later our fakery will be exposed and it will be deeply saddening for people to learn that what they thought was true was a hoax the whole time and that could ruin your reputation forever such that even if you changed in the future, people would always be cautious when you show them care.
A wise person said, people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.